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Not Working?

Why is it that when a woman or man decides to sacrifice their career to stay at home with their baby it’s considered “not working” by society?! I’m not saying everyone thinks this way but I am saying it seems to be the majority and to say it is offensive is a HUGE understatement! I have sacrificed everything I knew to stay at home with my son. While I have enjoyed every second of it, even through tears and frustration, it is definitely work…hard work! When someone says to me, “How do you enjoy not working?” Or “Are you “still” staying home with him?!?” I literally want to kick them in the face.

They have NO IDEA what I’m going through. So, how bout you don’t say stupid stuff. I’m raising a human being over here! It’s work…the best kind of work there is! I’m raising a citizen that is going to grow up and walk the streets and VOTE one day! So, you better pray to God that I’m working hard! My work matters.

People say the phrase “stay at home mom” like it’s a sweet, syrupy vacation. News flash…it’s not! It is the most important kind of work there is! I taught my child joy, love and kindness today(or at least tried). What did you do?

I am fully aware that it takes all kinds of different professions, talents and jobs to make the world go round. That’s the beautiful thing about the world we live in. I respect what you do and I know it’s important but your work is not more important than mine just because I have the title stay at home mom. So please don’t diminish it down to “not working.” While I’m ranting…

Before we ever tried to have a baby I made a very conscious decision that I wanted to stay home with my child. I fully realize that is not for everyone but it was/is a calling for me. I felt so strongly in fact that we prayed and saved for many years so that we could be able to afford this calling.

It didn’t just happen and I’m not “lucky.” We were intentional about living frugally so that we could listen to this calling. We have made many sacrifices over the years in order to do so. We haven’t taken fancy vacations or bought expensive things because we had a goal. For our family that was for me to be the one that gets to be with our child full-time.

While we have worked hard, I also whole heartedly acknowledge that all the glory goes to God. He has provided for us in every way possible. In fact because of the way He provides for us helped us know that it was a “God thing.” This is the reason we even have a baby. You see, we didn’t decide to bring a life into this world because that’s what you do after you get married. We spent a lot of time being intentional about the huge decision of bringing a life into this world! Then planning to do so once we knew that’s what God wanted for us.

So please stop with the thoughtless comments …

  • “you’re so lucky you get to stay home.”– Actually luck has absolutely nothing to do with it and there is no such thing as luck. We’ve worked hard so I got to choose to stay home and I feel blessed not lucky!
  • “Are you enjoying not working?” –Actually, I’m doing my most important work yet…raising a human!

Let’s just all be more thoughtful as we speak to each other. Words hold great power!


p.s. I had to add this one just cuz it was funny!

What has somebody said that offended you?

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