Being a mom is hard…these are words I heard many times before I ever became a mom. It kind of… or more accurately put, scared me a lot. It seemed so mysterious. I never heard an explanation as to why it was hard, just that it was. I believed all the women and the articles but it was still an unknown. Until I became a mom and then I knew.
Being a mom is hard but not in a bad or scary way, but it’s also important to say it’s super fun and rewarding. For those of you thinking about being a mom or just wandering what it would be like I am going to try and explain it to you from my perspective. It is hard because…
I have no idea what I’m doing. I read so many books, blogs and articles. I took classes, bought all the baby stuff, organized his room but nothing can prepare you for being a mom like actually being a mom. Once I brought my little man home I immediately knew what everyone was talking about. It is hard because you have never done this before. You have this little life looking to you for survival and you have to trust that you are making the right decisions for him. That’s hard but also a privilege.
I’ve never known a love like this, therefore, fear comes with it or at least it does in my mind. I love my son so much and it terrifies me that I’m going to do something wrong or put him in a situation that is not safe for him. Like going to a grocery story where someone is sick so then he gets sick.
I am way more protective than I thought I would be, well because that’s part of my job. He can’t protect himself yet, so that’s up to me. On a daily basis I have to remind myself that God trusted me with this little human and he knew I could do it and take perfect care of him. So, I try to let fear go and just love. One of my friends always says, “let your faith be bigger than your fear.” I often have to remind myself of this.
Just when you think you know what you’re doing, you don’t. I have had many times where I actually get kind of cocky thinking I have this mom thing down and then poop hits the fan…sometimes literally. What once worked doesn’t work anymore. Then you’re back to square one, not knowing what the heck you’re doing. This is hard because I like to feel like I am prepared for things in my life. But, when you do re-figure it out you feel incredibly proud…until the next time.
Everything takes longer. For example before having a baby one of the little things I enjoyed doing was going into a gas station to get a fountain drink. I know it sounds small but this is something that brought me a little piece of joy ,but now I can’t do it. Well, I could but is it really worth unbuckling the car seat and getting my son out of the car for when he already doesn’t love it in there?!
The up side is that now when I do get a drink from a gas station it’s a big deal and I save money by not getting so many drinks(not to mention the health benefits.)
It’s not all about you anymore. I like to think I am not a selfish person but if I’m real with myself I have to admit that I am pretty selfish. When you become a mom that all has to go out the window. This was something that I was super nervous about before my son arrived. I enjoyed “me” time.
Now that he is here I feel very differently about “me” time. I don’t need it nearly as often but when I do Aaron and I work something out. Although, I have found that if I don’t get any alone time I’m way more emotional which isn’t a good thing since I’m pretty emotional at any given moment. So, I’m still finding my happy place on this one.
Sleeping is hard. I don’t mean for me (but that is hard as well). I mean I didn’t know babies wouldn’t just fall to sleep when they’re tired. I didn’t know how much they should sleep or how often and I didn’t know I would need to help him get to sleep. I realize now that these are all big things not to know. It’s important because when there is a lack of sleep for your baby it leads to them being cranky. I feel like I had to learn this the hard way the first two months (or eleven months :)) of my sons life. This leads me to my next point.
Naps. I know this is still in the sleep category but it’s separate in my mind. As adults naps sounds so delightful. A moment to take a break, rest your head and recharge. Who wouldn’t want a nap?! Babies, that’s who. In the nap area I am very torn. Here are my two train of thoughts. I want to hold my baby as much as possible because as everyone says they grow up fast. Enter second train of thought. He needs to learn how to put himself to sleep and I need to get some things done around the house. Here lies the struggle and the struggle is real. As I tell my son, we will figure this out. My job is to help him and teach him how to be a successful citizen and that includes naps, but geez louise it’s hard!
Opinions, everyone has one! This one is particularly hard for me because I feel like I don’t know what I’m doing so sometimes I end up listening to everyone. The internet, articles and everyone’s advice is a blessing and a curse. With all the information everything tends to get all muddled.
Sleep training, when to introduce food, vaccinations and the list is literally never ending. There are so many opinions and so many decisions to make. That is why I have to remind myself daily well minutely. God gave me this child and He trusts ME to do the best thing for him. So, at the end of the day I need to do what I think is best and trust my momma instinct.
In case you were at a loss as to why being a mom is hard there are just a few of the reasons, but like the picture says it’s also superfun and an absolute privilege!
My son is the most amazing gift that has ever been given to me. I know that each decision I make is hard but guided by Christ who specifically chose me to be his mom. I know that I don’t want easy but I want worth it. Being a mom is indeed hard but it is an experience like none other I’ve ever known. To love so deeply without ceasing is something that leaves me in awe.
Nothing I said was meant to be discouraging. I just believe in being real. Anything worth it, is not going to be easy.
What is something you have done that is hard but worth it?